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“She does know you are 24 and married?” I asked sarcastically. “She knows Chloe and I did tell you she spanked me still.” He was still red faced. “I seem to think you said you were spanked at home. There was no suggestion it went on until we got married, nor that she still does” I said caustically. He was looking cautious, as though he knew he had kept this from me. “True” he conceded. “But she still does though. You know how she expects me to do what she says, well this happens when I don’t.” “Well, maybe I will say something when we go over to dinner on Sunday night” I said, still rather irritated. David looked at me, worried. Maybe he thought if I said something too harsh he would be the one to suffer. I knew my Mother in Law was overbearing domineering and often arrogant, but it was nonetheless a surprise to discover she still spanked her 24 year old son, my husband to boot. After all, I had often told him how childish I thought he was and whilst I found it a charming trait I. “You smell like piss.”“Every fucking year,” Nick vented. “You’d think the elves could figure this out. The air pressure makes a reindeer want to piss. Can’t those little bastards repurpose the cafeteria sneeze guard or something to redirect the spray? I’m surprised more people haven’t complained about their gifts.”Nick stripped to the buff, tossing all of his urine-soaked clothing into a large bin that the elves would retrieve for laundering. Debbie patiently waited and watched, while also keeping an eye on the driveway for an overdue delivery. When Nick was ready, she handed him a mug of some gifted hot buttered rum.“Did you add some of that Ping fella’s spicy rum?”“Sure did.”“Mighty fine gesture,” Santa continued. “All I get are illegible letters from greedy fucking kids. Gimme. Gimme. Gimme. Ping is permanently on my nice list.”“What did you gift him this year?”“An Amélie Poulain blow up doll. It was either that or a dildo drone that squirts butter milk.”“Oh, I think he’ll enjoy.
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